Word Vomit

I tend to do this...word vomit is what I call it. Pretty much it is when I say something that I really don't want to say. If I don't say it, it will bother me...sooooooo


Well, okay......I havent been able to sleep for 3 nights, and been having bad days..they get bad to the point I can't work, focus, breathe and I start crying....hmmm....

Sometimes, when I smell a certain smell, remember something, see something, all of a sudden I get like feeling of re-living an incident. I get stuck, like a dark cloud is surrounding my body and all I can see is that memory...it use to happen sooo much, then stopped and now is starting up again.

I have been working out soo much. I love to go running. When I run I forget everything, stress and hardcore thinking, just melt away...Normally I try to run an hour a day...lately, I am at about 3 hours a day ...last night I ran/walked 4 hours...as soon as teh kids were alseep, I got on and just went for it...I ahve been trying to make my nights go by faster, so teh night Goblins leave me alone...

I have started to have nightmares again (so childish right?) I am 19, mothering 4, I am suppose to be the one the kids come to when the night Goblins get them.


Hopfully this goes away soon...I know it will LOL